Six Months Of Silence

In blog entries I have often spoken of time moving quickly or not believing that it was already this date or that. Much of that, I think, was under the self-imposed pressure to write something, so I rebelled and wrote nothing over the last six months, almost to the day.

Now, perhaps, I have something to say again, perhaps….

Today I held the hand of a man who is in the hospital dying. During my moment there he spoke incongruent mental meanderings in-between his more sane statements. He has cancer that has metastasized to his brain and as a result he will die very soon, much to soon. We prayed and we cried as I visited with his mother and we spent time talking about his soon-to-be-held funeral. In some ways I liken the experience to opening a fresh jar of horseradish and taking a deep whiff. Not so much the burning sensation of the sinus cavity, but more like the clearing of the nasal passages so I could breathe again. It brought focus and clarity to my life and even to his mom’s life, through many tears of sadness and weakness.

My friend has spent the last several months sick with the aggressive disease that will shortly claim his body and release his soul from its tortured prison. Cancer has racked him like nothing else with a fury of pain and frailty. Yet, he has kept such a good outlook on life, believing the God could and would heal him. I too, shared his optimism that God could and would heal him, where we differed was the definition of healing. My friend, God is taking you home to be with him.

If only I spent the rest of my days, each and every one, with that perspective as my motive for living. Pray for Todd.